Like nomads.

I like to shift.

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#7

You stare at your shoes in that manner you always do when words don’t make the effort.
Recall. It’s like toffee-nut latte on labour day . What ever happened to christmas? The joy is now a negative as you seep through like soul in between the hinges of a door. I hear you when i put my ears against the walls . I’m contented, like that. I never meant to see you and i think it’s better this way. I hear death coming. Not yours but mine. For i remember under that full moon i vowed like a fool only for you . I sat on the ledge, thought about death long enough to mentally count the pins and needles pricking at my calves and my feet . You speak inspiration and you were luxurious in every way to me. But to you, the sempiternal truth is, i was all but mere reality.
This was how you left me.There was once I thought i was invincible but you broke me apart like an eggshell.  The rain bleeds like yolk and my heart , cold and dead like the dark. Not unless you kill me again, my ghost lingers and you, are my haunted.

Mend.

Let’s just say i have compressed enough thoughts to last me a lifetime. The sub-conscious mind has never worked so well with the conscious mind and trust me, i still know how to operate.  To have lived with accusations and still pretend like it doesn’t hurt has been good enough practice to being cold. A new kind of warmth that only i probably know. It takes the dignity of a feminine gender to greater heights. I love the thrill. Or maybe just for a while. ‘ My heart is an empty room’ is a great statement. Needless to say a great song title and in this case, the perfect understatement for me.

My thoughts have been so heavy recently that my emotions don’t seem to work.

I am numb to everything. But i like how it feels.

merry christmas !

Lindwall.

Clash.

I need a twix, you need a fix, were livin’ in boroed time,generation break down, destination no fun. But i know nothing really lasts forever in my dreams theres a highlight let me be. For you & me.

For all that a friend is worth.

I had cafe machiato at Keppel bay this evening. It was a painful choice of drink. When i thought machiato or rather when i saw machiato on the menu, i was thinking starbucks machiato. Not too bitter, not too sweet, nonetheless, perfect for my tastebuds. However , it turned out to be espresso coffee of some sort. Just espresso. No milk. No syrup. No sugar. I’ll give credit for it’s aroma but unfortunately , it just wasn’t the right time of day to be having espresso.

It was 2 and then it was 3 and now it’s already 5.15 am in the morning and i still can’t sleep.

Thank god it’s the term break.

#6

With every light you stole from my eye
I see the desire shine so bright
I start thee line with words i keep
deep down in my heart i try to shield

A kiss on the lip and i rule a dream
what more is there when i’ve kept you near
you never know how much is here
for deep down in my heart i try to shield

You touch my hand and i skip a beat
I glance at you as you take your peek
Unanswered are my questions still
because deep down in my heart i try to shield

You’ve made me see the hope and fears
but thou shalt still remain in tears
You silence my break of dawn as you leave your mark
for its the very last time you’ll lift me up

deep down in my heart i try to shield.

(Amanda)